Some folks are defensive about the concept of privilege. As soon as someone tells them they have privilege in a certain area they list all the ways in which they are behind the eight ball as proof they are not privileged.
Privilege is not universal. You can have privilege in one area and lack it in others.
Privilege is transient. You can lose it when your circumstances change or when the society and systems which granted you that privilege shift to exclude you.
Privilege is not bad. Privilege is a state of being you can apply for good or selfishness depending on what you choose.
Case in point: I was raised solidly middle class. My father’s job provided medical and dental insurance for our family. I grew up getting regular dental care, including braces when I got to middle school. Every job I have had as an adult has provided dental coverage. That is privilege, and my privilege in that area informs my decision to speak out in favor of all Americans being given high quality dental care at little to no cost to them. I could choose to fight that idea, claiming people just need to save up money or work harder to afford it, but I have too much compassion to do that based on how much more comfortable my life has been due to that privilege.
I am an African American woman who studied to be a computer engineer. During my engineering career it became clear that no matter how well I dressed, how standard my English was, how straight my hair was, how hard I worked, and how much education/experience I got there were people who would do everything in their power to keep me from advancing. They automatically questioned my abilities because of the color of my skin and/or my gender, and they created a paper trail of real and imagined missteps as “proof” that I do not measure up. Meanwhile my white male peers were given chances for improvement and granted forgiveness I was only grudgingly extended or not extended at all. In that predominantly white, male environment I lacked privilege.
My lack of privilege in that predominantly white, male space does not, however, erase the fact that when it comes to things like access to preventative dental care I am privileged (for now).
I do not feel defensive about my privilege. I acknowledge it and do what I can to even the playing field for others. If you find yourself feeling defensive when someone points out your privilege in a particular area, I recommend you take a few deep breaths and remind yourself they are not saying you have it easy in every area of your life. They are simply pointing out an area where you have the power to do good for others, if you choose.